Apprehension, fear and an end to everything?

Perhaps this would be an end to everything, the dreams n hopes n excitement for the past 2 months... since bearbear entered my life. I've never been an optimist, would rather be a pessimist n hope for the worst so that i would at least have a buffer should unpleasant stuffs happen.

my self confidence is at a new low, cos of my bad eating habits... so unprepared for my FIRST DATE! Perhaps it's the stress that's causing me to eat that much? the stress bout meeting up with bear bear? the stress that's causing me to fall sick?

I console myself by saying... if this guy were not to be interested in meeting me cos i'm fat and ugly, then he's not worth me keeping.... guess i have this phobia of falling in love... this insecurity that i'm not lovable and thus cannot sustain a r/s... Been obsessed with some guys, only to back out when they got more serious and expressed their feelings/ initiated a date... the fear of getting hurt is far more powerful then the desire to get hitched...

Thus, been eating lots to make myself as unattractive as possible... been neglecting to take care of myself so as not to carry this r/s further??? maybe i'm destinied to live my life alone, n to continue to dream of this knight who will sweep me off my feet....

Bought something for bearbear.... it'll be an apt parting gift... for all the joy he has brought to my life... i really really wish him all the best, and that he'll find someone really suited for him... i know i will read abt him in the papers someday, a successful person, and being featured with his lovely wife and adorable kids, I will be glad that i had once knew him, via the phone and internet....

I've decided not to live in my dream bubble any further, i will take the courage to step out n meet him for dinner. then he can get on with his life and me.... with mine....

Luggage totally packed

Leaving Brownie in Germany
My books & Documents not packed into the bag yet
My Luggage are super packed
Cream colour winter coat to be thrown

I am returning home soon, so much things to throw! Haiz. Its totally full, have to throw away clothes/ winter coat, doggie, and lots of documents.

THE MOMENTS

Whenever you dont have confidence in anything, remember that Daniel is here to guide & protect you.

• Whenever you feel upset or angry, remember how Daniel make himself silly to cheer you up.
• Whenever you feel happy, remember that Daniel has a part of it.
• Think for a moment how Daniel has touched your life, and you realise that most of the darkness were already taken away by him!

Give me your best! Settle for nothing lesser.

Dear Princess,

I know this may sound cliche, but to be honest you changed my life. From the moment I knew you. I knew you were a gift from God.
You constantly shower me with unconditional love and you always understand my shortcomings without criticism. Just looking at you is enough to make me happy. You have made me the happiest I have ever been.
You are sincere, caring, loving lady, and I wouldn't trade you for the world. My life is now full of promise, every day is worth looking forward to, and it’s all because of you. You made me become a better person.
We have known each other for awhile, and I have cherished every moment since day 1. Thinking about our future fills me with anticipation and excitement.
Our life together is already amazing, and together it will only get better and better. I will forever be grateful that you came into my life and made all my dreams come true.

Rocket away in Christmas

Miss You! You Light Up my Life!

  

This is the pair of keychains the princess bought. The princess is keeping one half of the keychain while the other half gets sent to Germany to keep Bear Bear Company. They are keychain torchs. Cos i wanna tell Bear Bear, "You light up my life!"....

Everything that was sent to bearbear has its significance... Too bad Bear Bear din expect Princess to send 2 cards n did not read the other one...

A surprise i had from Princess

I already knew that Princess gotten me something from singapore. I received it yesterday and the greeting card was so beautifully written, with chang chang and zaza talking to her. Asking her about her new found love. It was the best gift i can ever received cos she took the effort to complete my day!

Snowing in Germany!

Having stuck in singapore or rather asia for also half my life, i think the only snow i seen or encountered was the fake snow from Tanglin shoping center. Where they spray out some stoopid foams to create a christmas atmosphere, which never seems to impress me.

So finally after working in germany during winter, and playing with real snow. It was really lovely.

Get Well Soon, Bear Bear

BearBear's sick... Do take care, rest well, drink lotsa water and Get Well Soon K? Love you lots!

Have you seen bomb being Defused?

My holiday's in Paris last dec, proved to be fruitful. Even when i was in "BMT" in army, i have to throw grenade, and the procedures to clear the unexploded grenade was so different from Paris.

Me and my colleagues were outside the hotel, and all the sudden, there was lots of police, soliders locking down the area. The carpark infront of our hotel. We thought that maybe some ministers are coming, but instead we were greeted with a purple bag! Than came a police van, 2 man came out dressed in civilian clothes without any protective gears! They approached the bag, stuff a huge big gun with a wired controller attached to it, and placed it under the bag. He simply walked back to take cover behind his van. He blew a loud whistle, and booooomed!

The bag flew a few meters away and all the clothes flew out. Some stupid ass, left his bag there!My god, can you imagine that if it was a real bomb in it? I wouldnt be typing this now, even though i was hiding behind the pillar.

Her valentine's day present from me

From the start, i knew that she was the one.
Than again people often ask. How do you know she is the ONE? Well, it is such a simple question yet people get so confused over it. Just try and you will know isnt it! If we never try, than how do we know? So i tried and the first gift i gave to her was the lovely lilies.

On the eve of Valentine's day, she sms me saying. I got a gift for you, check your email in 10mins. I was so excited that, what is this woman trying to do. The best part was, i was in my colleague appartment dining.

It was a email with a powerpoint attached. And it was the best gift i ever had. It had pictures of her posting with food, its winter here and she brought me sunlight with her smile and i will never be sad. Cos she is there to make me smile!

Princess Holiday's are over

So after a week of talking to my Princess daily over a few hours, she is finally back to slog her butt off in school again! Markings papers and the never endless of work piling all over her bed! Which i think if i were to lie on her bed, i wont be lying on a bed of roses. But rather a bed of papers and book..hahaha

Princess & Bear Bear the Noti Boi Boi

SIA please fly me HOME

The moment i have been waiting for! Returning to the hot & sunny singapore after months away from singapore. Celebrating my birthday, hari raya, christmas, new year, chinese new year all here in Frankfurt! pui pui *Spilt saliva* March 30th will be the day, where i can hear all the singlish again :p

The grand finale is seeing my Little Princess, yahooooo! Please 30th come faster!!

She is the ONE

She brought warm to me during winter, she brought happiness to me when i am feeling lonely in germany. She listens to my tiny complaints. She accepts me of who i am. More importantly she cares and love me. That lady is none other than the Princess!

Why are there NO LASKA in Germany?

Bread, bread, bread, everywhere bread in Germany
A lunch which i cooked
Thai Food, all time favourite
The Original Pork Knuckles
Schenitzel mit kartofel

My Days in Germany

Working in Germany was tough, considering the fact that i am taken away from family & friends. But it was her *Princess* Who brighten up my days daily!

Princess,Princess, I am Princess

She brought me joy & sunlight in Frankfurt

The day which melted me! She told me not to address her as Lynn, it is for strangers who hardly knows her. Call her SL, that is what her friends called her! But i prefered Princess and she likes me to be her bear bear. That is how the story of The Princess and BearBear romance began.

The Smile!

The Smile which captured ME!

Your presence in my life brings wonderful smiles and loving thoughts within my heart.

Was it a Dream?

Yes, so the Bear Bear is none other than me (Daniel Martin).
I still remember very clearly that, that it was her sweet smile that attracted me to her! I drop her a message, but deep down, i know that she will not reply.
Than came a email!! It was her, Lynn. She replied me! Was it a dream? No, it was the day which change my life!
She always tells me to smile more and more, but well, i am just a guy who dont really smile. Not that the whole world owes me money. But its just me :p
But Lynn gave me a very good quote. Which i wont forget and i even tell my friends about it, when i notice that they are unhappy.

*Smile and the whole world will smile together with you.

The email which started it all

One day, in early Febuary, the Princess was checking her emails and happened to receive a message from a certain danielmartin77. (msn: daniel_martin77@hotmail.com) He asked the princess how was school so far and volunteered that his sister is a teacher too. Feeling bored, the Princess decided to check out his profile from the certain website. The above photo was what greeted her, along with his claims that he's a super rich guy with aeroplanes on his rooftop and bodyguards following him around. He is a guy without any vices, does not smoke, drink nor gamble... and he doesn't even tell lies!

The Princess laughed at this incredulous self-introduction but her curiosity was aroused. She is interested in getting to know this guy. N thus she clicked on the reply button.

Boy, was she glad she made the decision... this marks the start of a magical journey for her... and life will never be the same for this demure princess ever again....

The Story of Us...

The Princess and Bear Bear... A most romantic love story waiting to be told. How did it start? What makes it happen? Bear Bear shall continue the story...